A Flesh of Brilliance

The title card

A Flesh of Brilliance is the 47th episode of Action League Now!. It first premiered on the Kablam! episode, The Kablair! Witch Project on January 8. 2000.

Characters Present

• The Flesh
• Thundergirl
• Stinky Diver
• Meltman
• The Chief
• Bill the Lab Guy
• Justice
• Smarty Pants
• Smarty Pants' Robot
• Police Officer
• Workers

Plot

The episode begins one night at the repository of knowledge, where the evil genius, Smarty Pants, and his robot are stealing all of the world's books and CDs. Smarty Pants says that once he steals all of the world's books and CDs, he will have enough knowledge to take over the world.

Bill the Lab Guy has heard about Smarty Pants' evil plan and, with the help of the Action League, hides the rest of the world's knowledge in the last place he would ever think to look: The Flesh's brain. The Flesh is tied to a table and a transference helmet is placed on his head. He thinks the helmet is a party hat and it's his birthday. Bill then turns on his machine, and the knowledge is placed in The Flesh's brain, whom The Chief and Bill decide to check on and see if their plan was a success. It was, as The Flesh is now smart, assuring them that he is okay and Madison is the capital of Wisconsin. He then asks The Chief and Bill if they want to play chess with him.

At Action Headquarters, Thundergirl, Stinky, and Meltman watch The Flesh program a VCR and are impressed with him. When The Chief returns, The Flesh tells him that he has programmed the VCR to record nothing but the History Channel (much to the disappointment of the rest of the League). The Chief then informs the League that they must stop Smarty Pants and save the world's knowledge, telling The Flesh to stay behind, as they can't put his knowledge at risk. The Flesh approves of this idea and tells The Chief that they can communicate through radios, which he built from a kit he ordered online. The Chief takes one of the radios, and The Flesh corrects his grammar, annoying him. As they leave, he asks Thundergirl, Stinky, and Meltman if they liked The Flesh better when he was dumb.

A few minutes later, at the National Archives, The Chief tells Thundergirl, Stinky, and Meltman about his plan, until The Flesh communicates on the radio to correct his grammar once more. The Chief is angry with The Flesh, and this attracts the attention of Smarty Pants, who is on top of the bookcase and programs his robot on the shelf below to push the books, which land on The Chief, Thundergirl, Stinky, and Meltman.

Later, at Smarty Pants' hideout, The Chief, Thundergirl, Stinky, and Meltman are trapped in a net hung above a blender. Meltman asks Smarty Pants why they're in the net, and Smarty Pants explains that he is going to destroy them. He then turns on the blender as The Chief yells that they hid the world's knowledge in a place he wouldn't think to look. Just then, The Flesh appears, and Smarty Pants traps him in a cage. The Chief is not happy with The Flesh, as he told him to stay at Headquarters. The Flesh claims that he finds it dull having the whole world's knowledge when he can't show it off to anyone. Smarty Pants asks The Chief if The Flesh is where all the knowledge is hidden, then asks The Flesh about the capital of Ohio. The Flesh correctly guesses, "Columbus", and Smarty Pants knows that he underestimated The Flesh and wonders if a game of chess will prove who has the superior intellect. The Flesh likes this idea and decides to propose a wager; if he wins, Smarty Pants has to set the League free. If Smarty Pants wins, he can have the rest of the world's knowledge.

One hour later, The Flesh appears to be in the lead, as Smarty Pants' king is in great danger. Smarty Pants observes that The Flesh plays very well, but he's not finished. He presses the button on the clock, which launches a pawn that lands on The Flesh's head, knocking all of the knowledge out of it and returning him to his normal low IQ. Smarty Pants is satisfied with his evil plan, but the rest of the League are terrified! The Narrator asks the viewers if the League will be destroyed or if a brainless Flesh will win the chess game, then tells them to stay tuned for part two.

In the second act, Smartypants tells The Flesh that his time is running out and to move a piece, or the League will be lowered into the blender. The Flesh sees his knight and, mistaking it for a horse, wants to ride it. As he jumps on it, he accidentally pushes his queen towards Smarty Pants' king. This causes The Flesh to win the game, and Smarty Pants grieves over having lost to an moron. The League then cheers for the Flesh's victory.

Later that day, after the League is set free and Smarty Pants is arrested, the League works to return the books and CDs to where they belong. The Chief tells Thundergirl, Stinky, and Meltman that it's good to have the old Flesh back. Stinky agrees with him as The Flesh tells his knight that he likes him, knocking him into a worker that is holding a rope some of the books are tied in. They land on The Chief, Thundergirl, Stinky, and Meltman, who wearily wish the Flesh was smart again, ending the episode.

Quotes

• The Flesh: "I have successfully programmed the VCR..."

Thundergirl, Stinky, & Meltman: "Yay!"

The Flesh: "...to record nothing but the history channel."

Thundergirl, Stinky, & Meltman: "Boo!"

• Narrator: "The best build, the best brain. Is it too good to be true? You bet your grey matter."

Previous Episode

• Armageddon Outta Here

Next Episode

• Grief For The Chief

Chief’s Phrase

”I want you quieter than a mute mouse in a monastery.”

Gallery

"Dateline: The Living Room Repository of Knowledge, where the priceless record of human thought are pilfered by the evll genius, Smarty Pants."

"As soon as I steal the rest of the books and CD's, all the world's knowledge will be mine!"

"Is that genius or what?"

"With Smarty Pants on a swiping spree, the Action League safeguards the world's knowledge by putting it in the last place anybody would think to look: The Flesh's brain!" "Gooders! A party hat! Is it my birthday again?"

The world's knowledge is then transferred into the Flesh's brain.

"Well, Lab Guy, did you kill him?" "Flesh, can you hear me?"

"As sure as Madison is the capital of Wisconsin! Chess, anyone?"

"We find our heroes harnessing the Flesh's new brain power." "He did it. Amazing!" "If I hadn't seen, I wouldn't have believed it." "What's going on here?!"

"I have successfully programmed the VCR..."

"Yay!"

"...to record nothing but The History Channel."

"Boo!"

"All right. Cut the chatter, you clowns. Smarty Pants is out there and we gotta stop him."

"Excuse me, Chief, but there's no such word in the English language as 'gotta'."

"Uh, right. Flesh, you stay here. We can't pur your knowledge at risk."

"I'm a step ahead of you. To stay in touch, I fashioned these devices from a kit I ordered via the Internet." "Um, whatever."

"Let's move out."

"Tut, tut, Chief. Never end a sentence with a propositon."

"BLAST IT!! Let's... GO!!"

"All those who liked Flesh better when he was an idiot, say "Aye!'" "AYE!"

"Later at Dad's Study National Archives..." "Okay, people. I want you quieter than a mute mouse in a monastery. You two stay here. Me and Stinky will..."

"Excuse me, Chief."

"What is it now, Flesh?"

"Stinky and I."

"Blast it! This isn't grammar school! AND I DON'T HAVE TO TAKE ANYMORE..."

"What have we here...?"

"...OVERGROWN, OVERSIZED EGGHEAD!! GET ME?!"

"OR DO I HAVE TO COME BACK THERE AND SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU?!?!"

The League is buried in a pile of books.

"Later, in Smarty Pants' hideout..."' "What are we doing here?"

"I'll state it simply so your tiny brains could comprehend. You're about to be destroyed, obliterated, pulverized, expunged! Whew, I've got a good vocabulary."

Smarty Pants then activates a blender to destroy the League.

"The joke's on you, Smarty Pants! We've hidden the world's knowledge in a place you'll never find it!"

"Bonjour, mes amis!"

"Make that "adios, amigo!""

"My word!"

"Flesh, I told you to stay at Headquarters!"

"Pish-posh! What good is having all the world's knowledge if there's no one to whom I can show it off?"

"This nattering nay-bob is your so-called repository of knowledge?"

"Quick, name the captial of Ohio."

"Columbus, of course!"

"Correct! I obviously underestimated you. Perhaps a game of chess will prove my superior intellect."

"You strike me as a sporting man. May I propose a wager? If I win, you set us all free."

"And if I win, all the knowledge is mine!"

"You're on, Mr. uh..."

"Doctor. Doctor The Flesh."

"One hour later..." "Your king appears to be in grave danger, Monsieur Pantalon."

"You play very well, Dr. Flesh, but it's not over until the heavy-set woman warbles!"

"Your move!"

"Gollers. Where am I?"

"Blimey! The blow to the head knocked all the knowledge out of his brain!"

"Oh, no!"

"Oh, yes!"

"Lookers, I'm king of the castle!"

"Is this checkmate for the League? Or can a witless wonder match wits with a wicked wunderkind? Find out in the Action-brained conclusion of Action League Now!"

"The best build! The best brain! Is it too good to be true? You bet your gray matter!" "Time is running out, Dr. Flesh! Move or your colleagues perish."

"Oh, ho. Look at the horsey. I wanna ride the horsey!"

The Flesh accidentally moves his queen to Smarty Pants' king, inadvertently winning the chess game.

"Checkmate?! It's inconceivable. I, Smarty Pants, have been defated by an imbecile, simpleton, ignoramus, dullard!"

"Hooray!" "We're saved!" "Way to go, Fleshie!" "Bravo!"

"Later that day..." "I can't go to prison! I'm too smart for prison! Erudite, learned, scholarly...!"

"It's good to have the old Flesh back, huh?" "I'll say!"

"I like you, horsey."

"On second thought..." "The end."