The Quarky Syndrome

The Quarky Syndrome is the 19th episode of Action League Now!. It first premiered on the Kablam! episode, Get Sam Donaldson's Mystery Bag on December 5, 1997.

Characters[]

Bill the Lab Guy
Gunderson
Meltman
Quarky
Stinky Diver
The Chief
The Flesh
The Mayor
Thundergirl
Various Nuclear Reactor Employees

Plot[]

The episode begins at the Mayoral Mansion, where The Mayor has recently built a nuclear reactor to give him free unsafe energy. He switches it on, and all of his electronic devices power up.

Meanwhile, at the Mayor's nuclear reactor, Quarky, Bill the Lab Guy's daughter, walks by on her way home from school, wishing she could be a superhero like the Action League so she wouldn't have to go to school. Suddenly, an alarm goes off and lots of nuclear waste begins to shoot out, landing on her and making her disgusted.

At Action Headquarters, having heard about the nuclear disaster, the League loads their luggage into the Action Mobile to evacuate from the neighborhood. Bill then tells them that there will soon be nowhere in the world to run to, as The Mayor's nuclear reactor is about to blow. When it does, it will wipe out every living organism on the planet! The Flesh, completely missing the point of what Bill's saying, decides that they will have to go to Europe. However, The Chief argues that they're not going anywhere, because they must shut down the nuclear reactor!

Meanwhile, The Mayor is on the phone, planning to order some electronic devices from Smarter Image. Suddenly, an alarm goes off and he sees the League on his security camera, driving to shut his nuclear reactor down. Thinking quickly, he flips a switch, which turns on a lawn mower that chases after the League across the street. They manage to escape from the lawn mower, or so they think, as it sneaks up in front of them and tears them apart!

Back at Bill the Lab Guy's laboratory, Quarky asks her father what's happening to her, as she hasn't felt the same after the nuclear reactor incident. Bill tries to comfort her by saying that she is simply going through puberty, revealing that her body is changing in odd (but wonderful) ways. Suddenly, Quarky accidentally splits her father in half with laser beams that shoot from her eyes. She then apologizes, but Bill, although split in half, calmly insists that it's perfectly normal.

Back at the Mayoral Mansion, The Mayor is shredding all of his unsafe nuclear reactor safety reports. Gunderson, one of his nuclear safety technicians, warns him that the water level is dangerously low, and if they don't shut the reactor down, it will explode! The Mayor ignores Gunderson and insists that he can have the rest of the day off. He then turns on the waffle iron Gunderson was standing in the middle of, which closes on him. After that, The Mayor sees the nuclear reactor out of control and the rest of his employees panicking on his security camera, deciding to leave for Europe on his lawn mower. The Narrator asks the viewers if The Mayor's nuclear reactor will spell the end of the world and if anyone can stop it, since the League is now in pieces, then tells them to stay tuned for part two.

In the second act, with the fate of the Earth hanging in the balance, only Bill can shut off the nuclear reactor. Unfortunately, there's nothing he can do. Quarky then implies that she thinks she can shut it off, suddenly transforming into a superhero called Superteen! With that, she flies onto the nuclear reactor (although she bumps into the ceiling in the process), but Bill is not happy and tells her to get down, or she's in loads of trouble. This gives Quarky an idea, who looks at a sign that says: Unbalanced Load, opens up the reactor, and finds the problem inside. Bill, who is still mad at her, yells that she's grounded, whether or not she's a freakish mutant! Quarky then tosses a stray slipper (which was the problem) in the reactor onto him and shuts the reactor off. A second later, every one of The Mayor's electronic devices power down, including his lawn mower, which launches him into the road. Finally, The Mayor gets run over by a car, making him hate Mondays.

Moments later, the injured and bandaged League in a terribly-destroyed Action Mobile arrives at the scene of the disaster, where The Chief thanks Bill for shutting off the nuclear reactor. Bill argues that he didn't shut it off - it was Quarky, who then introduces her new identity, Superteen, to the League, saying she's a superhero, just like them. The League doesn't believe her and thinks she's only wearing a halloween costume, pretending to be one. Quarky, outraged, snaps that her name is Superteen and melts the Action Mobile with her laser eyes. The League now believes her and agrees to call her by that new name, ending the episode.

Quotes[]

Stinky Diver: "Action League away! Far away."
Meltman: "Ow!"

Thunder Girl: "Pain!"

Stinky Diver: "Not having fun!"

The Flesh: "Ouchies!"

The Mayor: "Europe! Here I come!"

Narrator: "Will one man's greed destroy a perfectly good planet? With the League members dismembered, can anybody stave off the Earth’s destruction? Stay tuned for the action-contaminated conclusion of Action League Now!"

Narrator: "A reactor, critical mass. A League, critical mulch. With the fate of the Earth hanging in the balance, all eyes turn to an intrepid Lab Guy."

Bill the Lab Guy: "There's nothing I can do."